I only have my hair cut by Kazakhstanis these days, and highly efficient they are too.

Sadly I’ve reached an age where the eyebrows also require a whisk over and they’ve started putting flames into my ears.

But, even with these showy extras, my number two at the sides and back, with a little bit longer on top, cut still takes less than eight minutes.

I know this because the last time I was at the barbers I took the trouble to make a note of my time in the chair. And the cost of this cut is exactly £15, which means it’s basically two pounds a minute.

The trouble is, I had to wait three-quarters of an hour to get my chance because the young fellow ahead of me in the queue was so specific about his haircut.

Faders and razor cuts were just a few of the terms used and I really didn’t understand some of the terminology relating to overhanging hair ledges, undercuts and cutting lines.

At one point things became so confusing I began to wonder if they’d moved out of English all together and switched to their native Kazakh.

Add to this the fact everything is wetted down about a dozen times and an endless variety of buzz razors are picked up, and put back down, about 50 times. And the cost of this very technical, complicated haircut? – £16 for a whopping 43 minutes work, and I know this because I took the trouble to time them too.

This means they’re paying just 37p per minute.

However, my attention to the finances of haircuts were interrupted at this point because the gentleman in the right-hand chair was finished, or so I thought.

Just as I edged forward in my seat the barber reached for a towel and proceeded to run it under the hot water.

I’d liken this to the point I made a few weeks ago about someone ordering a machine coffee in a pub when you’re trying to order a pint - there will always be someone wanting a hot towel shave when you’re waiting for your short back and sides.

Though to be fair, beard trimming does incur an extra charge and, just as the publican appreciates a bigger mark-up on coffee than beer, the barber will be keen on customers who require extra services.

I suspect barbers aren’t about to start charging based on the length of time your haircut takes, so I’ve decided the only way to get my money’s worth in future is to shift to a more exotic hairstyle or order some extra grooming.

In future, I will listen more carefully to those requesting fades, razors, undercuts, etc, so I know what to ask for.