Welcome to Bob’s Blog, the innermost thoughts of kmfm breakfast show presenter Bob Mower.

You can listen to Bob on weekdays from 7am-11am at 106FM.

____________________________________________

I ordered a part for my PC from a well-known PC parts supplier and paid on-line.

The receipt stated 'use your order code to check the latest status of your order,' but a day went by, then two days, three days

- and nothing!

'Ring customer services if you have a problem with your order,' said the website. I rang customer services using the number provided and was connected to India.

"How can we help you sir?" said a distant, crackly male voice.

I explained my predicament, he checked and came back saying: "Your order number doesn't exist sir, are you sure it's correct?"

I double checked, and it was correct.

"I have an idea," said the distant, now even more crackly voice, "Are you a company or private individual?"

"Private," I replied.

"Right then," said the crackly voice who has by now been joined by a noise which resembles a small hurricane, "I'll transfer you to somebody who can help."

But help was not close at hand.

Help was about 15 minutes arriving, during which time I was serenaded by somebody whose voice has been over the tape heads about five million times too often.

"Thank you for holding," said another person eventually, "We have located your order and the delivery time is thirty days."

"THIRTY DAYS? But it said I will receive it within seven when I placed the order."

"Ah yes but that's when it's in stock which this part isn't."

"So why wasn't I told when I ordered it?"

"I don't know sir, but I can't help you any further, would you like me to put you through to customer services so that you can ask for a refund?"

At this point I decided that I would wait the 30 days.

THE NEXT DAY IT ARRIVED! Or didn't. An attempt to deliver it was made but as no-one was in, it was taken back to the depot, a card posted through the letterbox telling me to ring an 0845 number 'and speak to our team of customer service advisers who are ready to ensure your order is delivered when you want it!'

That's of course if this particular company actually employs any customer service advisors.

Even a Tom, Dick or Harry in the yard would have been good because after waiting on the phone for 90 minutes (yes, 90 minutes!) I gave up and then got seriously annoyed.

I looked up head office in the phone book, gave vent to my feelings at some poor receptionist who put me through to a . . .customer service advisor.

"Yes mate, how can we help you?" said a voice.

"Are you a customer service advisor," I said.

"Not really," said the voice (who later admits to being Dave), "She's having her lunch."

"Big company yours is it?" I said.

"Massive," said Dave. "Nationwide, 24 hours a day."

"Do you get many complaints about your customer services," I asked.

"Not many," says Dave, "Yours is the first today."

Anyway, after all this went on for a while, Dave agreed to over-ride the system and promised me that he would do his best to get it delivered the following afternoon, although adding that it would be at the discretion of the delivery driver.

"So what happened to the promise that your team of customer service advisers are ready to ensure my order is delivered when I want it?"

"We only say that." said Dave.

I put the phone down before I spontaneously combust.

• Look forward to you joining me for breakfast on kmfm. You can contact me on 01227 786106 or email me via our website, www.kmfm.co.uk/canterbury