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Death Cafes running in Faversham at Abbey Physic Community Garden

By: Katie Davis

Published: 06:00, 18 January 2020

It is commonly said there are two things in life that are unavoidable - death and taxes. So why is it, as a society, the first has become such a taboo?

In a bid to break down the stigma, Faversham-based counsellor Louise Allen has helped the town join the worldwide Death Cafe movement.

Faversham-based counsellor Louise Allen says death is "often a taboo subject"

Discussing death over a slice of cake and cup of coffee with complete strangers is a concept many would run from.

But with most of us avoiding ever talking about it, these cafes are helping open up the conversation and make it easier to discuss.

Tucked in a wooden cabin in the tranquil Abbey Physic Community Garden, Louise - alongside Roz Macklin - ran the first free cafe in Faversham in December with a group of 15 people.

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"Unexpected death is something I have personal experience of," she said.

"I grew up knowing that death is something that not only happens to us all at some point a long way into the future, but something that can happen at any time.

The first Death Cafe in Faversham attracted 15 people

"I have been drawn to difficult conversations for as long as I can remember, and death and dying is one of those.

"I suppose that finding ways to talk about and make sense of my thoughts and feelings about life, death and the meaning of it all has given me a sense of real connection with people and reminds me I'm not alone."

Louise says part of the beauty of the cafes is that everyone is there to discuss the same thing, with no fear of being questioned or judged.

The movement was started in 2011 by Jon Underwood from his home in east London. His intention was to start Death Cafes as a safe and informal space for people to come together and talk about the end of life over coffee and cake.

Roz Macklin will be running sessions with Louise

Louise was inspired to start the sessions in Faversham after attending some herself.

"After going along to a couple, I found surprising comfort and liberation from having a space to talk, with strangers, about death and dying," she said.

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"It is something that is going to happen to us all, even if we haven't encountered the death of anyone close to us.

"I kept bumping into Roz at these events, and we both turned to each other after the last one in Canterbury and knew we wanted to set one up in Faversham to give other people the space to connect and talk about an often taboo subject."

The next Death Cafe will be held on Sunday, February 16, from 2pm until 4pm at the Abbey Physic Community Garden.

For more information, click here

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