Grieving mothers have hit out at a "cold and unsympathetic" council after being asked to remove decorations and fences from their babies' graves.

Carys Berry and Abigail White both have children buried at St Peter's and St Paul's Church in Boughton-under-Blean, near Faversham.

On Monday they received a letter from the parish council, along with others, saying their graves were "not being maintained in accordance with the regulations".

They were told if the decorations - which "present difficulties" when cutting the grass - are not cleared up by February 28, the items will be removed.

Mrs Berry's son Toby was stillborn in 2017. Then four years later her baby Phoenix died aged just nine weeks from sudden infant death syndrome (SIDS).

The boys are buried together in the same plot in the cemetery in South Street and every year the family decorate the grave on birthdays and at Christmas as a way to show their love.

But after receiving the council's letter, Mrs Berry was left "speechless and offended".

The 24-year-old,from Selling, added: "It doesn’t just apply to somebody who has lost two babies, this relates to everyone who has lost someone.

"You can’t buy them birthday presents, you can't throw them parties - how else are you supposed to celebrate their birthdays?

"You have so much love to give but they are not here to show that any more.

"And what about those who can’t afford a headstone? They are left with nothing if they’re not allowed ornaments.

"It's exhausting because it hasn't even been 18 months since I lost Phoenix and I'm still grieving.

"This is another battle I have to fight and it's something I shouldn’t have to do.

"The tone of the letter had no compassion or empathy for what people are going through.

"There has never been an issue for the past five years, so why is there an issue now?

"When the ornaments fade or break, I take them away. It’s never tacky - it is always done tastefully."

Mrs Berry's daughters Lily, three and Isabella, three months, also like to take their brothers gifts when they visit - something which they are not now allowed to do.

"We can't take them out or buy them Christmas presents so this is how we show our love and they just want to take that away..."

A few plots away from Toby and Phoenix rests Ava-Grace Edwards, who would have turned one in September.

Her mother Abigail White, 27, tries to visit every day and has put up a fence with candles and fairy lights.

The mum from Boughton, who has since welcomed baby Tommy, plans to start a petition against the rules.

"These are our babies that we didn’t get to spend any time with," she said.

"We can't take them out or buy them Christmas presents so this is how we show our love and they just want to take that away.

"It's not a mess, none of the graves are. It's always nice, neat and tidy apart from when the gardeners strim and there is grass over everyone’s graves.

"They only give you a choice of three colours of headstones. You have to have their headstones or nothing.

"So you already have to deal with that rule, and then they tell you there can't be ornaments.

"There is no personalisation at all."

The parish council says families are given a list of rules when they first buy the plot detailing what they can and can't do.

However both Mrs Berry and Miss White dispute this.

Mrs Berry said: "I don’t believe there was any paperwork or reiteration of the rules.

"It was a highly emotional time - it’s the last thing you want to be reading.

"To add insult to injury, that land was donated to them by my husband's late uncle."

Miss White added: "I don’t remember receiving the letter they told me I should have received.

"If I’d have known about it before, I wouldn’t have had her buried there."

Boughton-under-Blean parish council, which owns the land where the children are buried, sent out the latest letter on January 26.

It says: "The Parish Council's Public Amenities Committee recently inspected the cemetery and regret to advise you that the plot was not being maintained in accordance with the regulations (of which you should have received a copy when the plot was purchased and a summary of the regulations are on the noticeboard within the cemetery).

"The Parish Council must maintain a high level of maintenance throughout the cemetery and to ensure a high standard of care for all the plots within its control.

"The Civic Cemetery is intended to be a place where the visual aesthetics should be pleasing to all who use it.

"Graves should be level with the ground surface, grassed over and free of decorations other than those permitted on the headstone."

The letter warns that after February 28, any grave which does not conform to the regulations "will be addressed" by the parish council.

It adds that fences or other features "present difficulties in cutting the surrounding grass and are therefore not permitted in accordance with the regulations".

When asked by KentOnline about the upset caused by the letter, a spokeswoman for the parish council invited members of the public to attend its next meeting.

"Local residents are [...] always welcome to attend the monthly meetings to express their point of view..."

"Decisions are made and agreed by parish councillors at parish council meetings," she said.

"Local residents are encouraged to contact members of the parish council or the clerk and are also always welcome to attend the monthly meetings to express their point of view.

"The next full council meeting is on Tuesday, February 7, where the matter is on the agenda for discussion.

"All are welcome to attend the public meeting."