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The Darkest Hour 3D (12A, 88 mins)
Sci-Fi/Action/Thriller/Romance. Emile Hirsch, Max Minghella, Olivia Thirlby, Rachael Taylor, Joel Kinnaman, Dato Bakhtadze, Veronika Vernadskaya. Director: Chris Gorak.
The Dullest Hour would be a more fitting summation of Chris Gorak's special effects-laden thriller, which witnesses a devastating alien attack from the perspective of five young people trapped in Moscow.
It's refreshing to be far from American soil for the extermination of mankind by otherworldly predators.
Images of the deserted Russian capital are chilling and Gorak showcases the city's impressive architecture and landmarks as survivors search for pockets of human resistance amid the rubble.
However, screenwriter Jon Spaihts doesn't have a good ear for dialogue ("I'm just trying to keep my freak-out on the inside!") and his characters are two-dimensional and completely disposable.
His invaders are invisible to the human eye then, for the sake of cinematic thrills, he has to half-bake some hokey science to reveal the extra-terrestrials' corporeal form so they can be destroyed by modern weapons.
The creature design - sour-faced trolls in spinning, electrified orbs - is not the visual effects department's finest hour.
The big reveal of the hunters from beyond the stars is greeted with hoots of derision, matched only for unintentional hilarity by the arrival of a text message in the film's closing moments.
Aspiring internet entrepreneurs Sean (Emile Hirsch) and Ben (Max Minghella) fly thousands of miles at their own expense to sell their online tourist guide to the Russians with the help of their Swedish business partner, Skylar (Joel Kinnaman).
However, Skylar rips them off and steals the intellectual property.
"That's criminal!" whimpers Ben.
"Welcome to Moscow," smirks Skylar, signing his death warrant as punishment for wanton greed.
Sean and Ben drown their sorrows at the fashionable Zvezda Nightclub where they meet globe-trotting photographer Anne (Rachael Taylor) and her best friend Natalie (Olivia Thirlby).
The party reaches a crescendo just as Moscow is hit by a blackout.
Clubbers pour on to the street as luminescent shapes fall from the sky, heralding an alien invasion.
The invisible extra-terrestrials vaporise humans on contact and Sean, Ben, Natalie and Anne seek refuge in the club's basement along with Skylar.
Through observation, the survivors deduce that the aliens emit electromagnetic wave energy.
Armed with light bulbs as rudimentary early warning devices, the survivors make their way through the wasteland of Moscow, crossing paths with feisty Russian teenager Vika (Veronika Vernadskaya) and inventor Sergei (Dato Bakhtadze).
The Darkest Hour starts promisingly but boredom surfaces soon after the aliens begin culling the extras.
Genuine emotion doesn't trouble Hirsch, Minghella and co as the film wheezes and splutters from one lacklustre set piece to the next.
Plot information is delivered largely as clumsy expository dialogue by characters who seem incapable of remembering their own name let alone distilling the finer points of the electrical resistivity of glass.
"Teamwork makes the dream work!" chirps Sean.
Sweet dreams are not made of this nonsense.
:: No swearing :: No sex :: Violence :: Rating: 4/10