SINGLE mother Tara Ashley had an affair with a man she met in an Internet chatroom but she ended up handing over £22,000 to him.

He squandered it on his gambling addiction, magistrates at Ashford were told.

When Ashley could no longer pay any of her bills she stole more than £600 from the till at Woodchurch Post Office, near Ashford, where she worked as a counter assistant.

Now Ashley, 30, of Bridge Close, Woodchurch, is facing bankruptcy and ruin after admitting two counts of theft from the post office.

Ashford magistrates sentenced her to 200 hours’ community punishment but chose not to fine her or order her to repay the stolen money because she is facing bankruptcy.

Peter Holt, prosecuting, said: “Managers installed a secret CCTV camera at Woodchurch post office.

“They saw her take money from the till and place it in her handbag and also saw her stick a postage label on a private parcel without paying for the postage.”

When questioned about the theft of £60, Ashley confessed to police she had earlier stolen £600.

Steve Tarleton, defending, told the court how Ashley had fallen for a man she met ‘on the net’.

He said: “They say love is blind, but in this case it was expensive too. The word that springs immediately to mind is trust and this was obviously a breach of trust, but Miss Ashley was being systematically conned by a man she had met over the Internet.

“She was in love with him and trusted him implicitly and when he came to her for money she borrowed to give it to him, and borrowed heavily!

Mr Tarleton explained how she ran up debts of £22,000, all of which she had handed over to her internet lover.

“She is not an inherently dishonest woman. She took the only action she thought was available to her and that involved stealing from her employers,” he added. “The relationship was doomed not to go very far.

“The man was lying to her the whole time to win her trust. He had a gambling addiction and spent all the money she gave him.

“She was caught red-handed and offered up the other money.

“There was a sense of relief when she was caught that it was all over,” added Mr Tarleton.

The magistrates said: “We take theft from employers and the inherent breach of trust very seriously.

“The actions you took put others under suspicion. However, we are not going to send you into custody and we see no practical purpose in making any financial penalty upon you because you are facing bankruptcy and are unable to pay.”

After the court hearing Ashley said she had been lonely when she logged onto the internet for the first time and joined an online dating agency.

It wasn’t long before she was being sent messages from a good-looking man in London who seemed genuinely interested in what she had to offer.

She was flattered by his attentions and they chatted for hours, sending live chat messages back and forth over the internet.

They exchanged photographs. They chatted using a web camera to see each other. Soon she was texting and chatting to him on his mobile phone.

And then the man - she knew only as Ray - suggested they meet. Wisely, Tara chose a public place and the pair enjoyed a drink at the French Connection pub on Ashford’s Orbital Park. She fell immediately for the man’s good looks and easy charm and fun-loving nature.

She said: “He made me laugh. He was fun to be with and I felt very comfortable with him. I knew then that I would see him again."

The next date was to be at Tara’s home in Bridge Close, Woodchurch. Her new-found friend came over and they chatted for hours before Tara went to bed leaving him on the couch to sleep.

“He hadn’t made any sort of move on me and that made me feel even more comfortable with him," she said. "He was just nice to be with. He was very attentive and very caring."

But a sexual relationship developed between the two, although it always happened at her home. They rarely went out and the 30-year-old only had a mobile phone number for her new lover. She did not have a full name or address or even a landline phone number for him. He said he worked at a children’s home in Margate but lived near Tower Bridge in London.

“It wasn’t an earth-shattering love affair, but I felt things for him. He was good company. It was a relationship and he was just what I wanted,” she said.

One day Ray called her to say he was in trouble and needed money. She was concerned and her boyfriend spilled out his heart.

He said a teenage girl at the home where he worked had accused him of touching her and he needed money to fight the case and pay for legal help.

“I told him I didn’t have any money. And he came out with a string of credit cards where they would give low income people credit with no checks. He begged me to help him and I did. He said he couldn’t get any credit.

“When the first credit card came through he was so very grateful. It was in my name and the agreement was that he would have it and the PIN and when the bill came he would settle it. I didn’t think this was too bad an arrangement,” she said.

A second card arrived, then a third. The time came due for the bills to be paid and Ray cleared all the cards and repaid hundreds of pounds. This put Tara’s mind at rest. She thought he was genuine and was now prepared to go even further to help him.

Four more credit cards were applied for and four more were handed over. Then Ray persuaded Tara to take out a loan for £3,000 and a second loan on her car for £1,500. She complied.

“After all, he had paid back everything the first month so I didn’t think anything of it. I was just helping out my boyfriend,” she said.

But alarm bells rang when the next statements turned up and nothing had been paid off any card or loan. Tara tried in vain to contact Ray on all three of his mobile numbers but to no avail. He was nowhere to be found.

“I left messages where I could but he didn’t pick up the phones. I was really worried. I was ill with an infection and by the time I was well enough to take stock of the situation things had gone completely out of my control.

“I worked out that I owed £22,000 in unpaid bills, on loans and on credit cards what with interest and late payment charges. Every letter I had was from a debt collector and every phone call was chasing money.

“That’s when I was at my lowest ebb and I stole from the post office. It paid off the most immediate creditors and got them off my back. I needed breathing space. I couldn’t talk to anyone about it,” she said.

Tara would normally have turned to her family but her mother was dying from cancer and she could not bear to be a burden to them.

“I managed one conversation with my mum about what trouble I was in but then no more. She couldn’t take it. I made her even more ill and I will never forgive myself for that,” she said.

Instead, Tara tried again to contact her lover. She called every children’s home in Kent but no one had heard of him. She tried dozens of names in the Margate phone directory and eventually, by sheer fluke, managed to contact the man’s father.

“He told me I had been stupid to lend him the money and said there was nothing he could do. He said he wasn’t in touch with Ray and asked if I was pregnant too. Luckily I wasn’t. He said that Ray had done this kind of thing before,” she said.

Tara then tried to get help from the police. An officer chatted to her at home about her plight but eventually the police told her she had no case against the man because she had willingly handed over the money as a gift.

“I couldn’t believe what I was hearing. He had taken £18,000 off me and there was nothing anyone could do. I was desperate and tried to steal again when I was caught red-handed. I was grateful in a way it was all over,” she said.

Tara had one final, chilling contact with Ray. He texted her and said: “Never contact my father again or I will never pay back the money and that will be the end of it!”

To this day she has not heard another word from him, and he has not repaid a single penny, but she has pieced together what happened to the thousands of pounds from the credit cards and loans.

The man set up an internet betting account using her cards and spent hundreds of pounds on horse racing, football and other bets.

He bought new clothes and went on shopping sprees at the Bluewater shopping centre at Greenhithe, near Dartford.

She believes he even bought a new car.

Now her ordeal with the courts is over, Tara is warning other lonely women to beware of befriending men over the internet.

“Men can tell you a pack of lies and you just won’t know. They can seem loving and genuine and then you will get hit with something like this. I will never know what was truth and what was lies with Ray.

“The internet is a good thing and if you are sensible it is safe to meet people on there. But if you are not careful it can be dangerous and very costly. I have lost everything because of this man.”

“I would hate this to happen to anyone else,” she added.