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A dad who shot another man in a road rage incident sobbed repeatedly as he told a jury of his baby daughter's serious medical condition - and his intention to kill himself.
Paul Smith bought a homemade gun from someone he knew from banger racing to commit suicide.
But instead of using it on himself, Smith turned it on James Saunders, 32, wounding Mr Saunders in stomach.
Mr Saunders underwent major surgery and was in hospital 10 days.
Smith told the jury he fired because he was frightened after a confrontation with Mr Saunders but did not realise he had been shot.
Smith, 46, of Friar's Way, Dover, was on trial at Canterbury Crown Court where he denied attempted murder and alternatively wounding with intent.
He was cleared of trying to kill Mr Saunders but convicted by a 10 to two majority of the wounding on October 26
Sentence was adjourned for psychiatric and probation reports and Smith will be sentenced on August 27.
Judge Adele Williams told Smith she needed to know much more about him before sentencing and there needed to be an assessment of his risk to the public.
Mr Saunders had stopped his car near Alkham to remonstrate with Smith about his driving.
He had been driving close to Mr Saunders' vehicle and when Smith overtook him, Mr Saunders flashed his lights.
When he did that, Smith slammed on the brakes and both men got out and exhanged words which turned into pushing and shoving.
Smith then took the gun from his pocket and shot Mr Saunders before getting back into his Renault and driving off.
Mr Sauders told the court how he felt strange, dizzy and disorientated but walked back to his friends.
He looked down at his stomach and felt a surge of pain then lifted his
hoodie and blood just gushed out. He cried out he had been shot and stumbled towards his car before losing consciousness.
In evidence Smith spoke of job loss, family bereavement and divorce but met his present wife and married in 2005 and their baby daughter was born October last year, days before the shooting.
She was diagnosed with an extremely rare skin condition called EB which was potentially life threatening.
Smith broke down as he recaled how pain control was a major problem and said the baby was at the limit of morphine.
On the Sunday he was shown how to change her nappy and taught about lifting and dressing and it was against this background he bought the gun to kill himself.
"I used to do banger racing and you meet various sorts of people doing that.
"A hosepipe in the car was the favourite method but it's a long process and most people end up as cabbages.
"I wanted something quick. When I collected it, I did not have a clue what it would be like," said Smith.
He went to the man's yard and said he needed something for protection and the man produced the weapon in two pieces for £350 and Smith put it in the glove box.
The next day he still was not sure what he was going to. On the Monday evening when he agin left to go to the hospital, the gun was in his pocket.
It was dark and he came up behind Mr Saunders' car.
"I was emotional and could not stop crying," said Smith.
The other driver was going slower and in the middle of the road as he turned a bend. When Smith eventually passed him, Mr Saunders flashed his lights and caught up with Smith by the village.
He agreed he may have slammed on his brakes but did not recall doing so.
"I remember him outside his car shouting. I stood by my door and remember him standing still and shouting at me for a bit."
He did not agree with evidence that Mr Saunders walked towards him fast but remembered being frightened.
"The passenger door opened then he came to me. I just closed my eyes and fired. I fired because I thought I've had it.'
"I do not know why I fired as I did. If I had been thinking I would not have got out of the car. I did not realise he had been shot. The next thing I knew he was in my face.
"I got into my car. I watched him walk away, that's the bit I don't understand, he walked away, got in the car and waved his arm," said Smith.
He realised he had shot the other man the next day. Smith hid the gun and his clothing, aware having a gun carried a five year jail term.
He said he had shot it in a public place and people had seen him. He could not believe it when he learned what had happened.
He had to try and arrange things for his wife before handing himself in on November 4.
"I discharged the gun to frighten him. The idea was just a flash in front of us to frighten him," said Smith.