At KentOnline we’ve done food reviews in industrial estates, nature reserves and even tipis – but I don’t think we’ve ever been served a “Fandango Ice-Cream Iced Coffee” from a floating longboat.

This was definitely a first for me.

It’s Monday midday. I’m walking along the River Medway, it’s absolutely scorching and I’m becoming more and more red as I head into Maidstone.

Past a bridge and out of the corner of my eye I see a little boat on the right-hand side – how have I never spotted this before?

I guess when I had ventured into town on other days I stayed within the comfortable confinements of Fremlin Walk, Week Street and The Mall.

But in-between the two main bridges, dead centre of the one-way system, lies The Old Boat Cafe.

The historic former horse-drawn FMC narrowboat – named Verbena – has been fully restored and is now used as a seasonal floating eatery.

It felt like I was in my own episode of Rosie and Jim.

I head up to the counter and get greeted by a very cheerful lady who tells me to take a seat outside wherever I’d like.

They apparently stay open come light rain or sunshine, but may have to close when it is very windy. Normally it is judged on the day.

There were plenty of seats available for me to choose from, though all of which were catching the sun.

A couple had already bagged a table behind a tree, and as there were no parasols I resorted to moving a chair near to the shade as much as possible.

Despite wearing lotion, I have almost vampiresque skin. I was worried I was going to either end up the colour of a tomato or start spontaneously sparkling.

The cafe serves a mix of both breakfast and lunch, from a Boatman’s Breakfast, Soft Pancake Stack, Canalman’s Cheese Platter to a Boatmade Sausage Roll.

All of which are reasonably £10 or under.

I found a lot of the items available were quite light and wouldn’t bloat or weigh you down – perfect for the summer months.

They also do a “Mini Menu”, which isn’t mentioned on the website but is a great alternative if you have little ones that can’t stomach adult portions.

Once decided, I went back up to order and went for the Lock Keeper’s Garden Salad, which changes daily. Today was a Mediterranean Salad.

It has a pepper and olive couscous, sweet potato falafel with lemon houmous and mixed leaf salad.

On the menu online it said it would be £8, however on the boat board it was priced at £9.

I had the option to add a sourdough roll for an extra £2, but I knew I wouldn’t need any more carbs than what I was getting.

The lady then said they sadly had no houmous, which was a little bit disappointing, but I could swap it for whatever else they had instead.

She apologised and mentioned how working in the heat over the weekend had frazzled them – I don’t blame them!

I went for brie instead, which was a nice alternative.

For drinks, I needed something cold and refreshing. The Fandango Ice-Cream Iced Coffee was a mouthful to say but definitely caught my eye.

I was told it was a chilled coffee, with syrup and an ice cream float on top.

A pimped-up version of my favourite summer drink? Sign me up.

That was also advertised online as £5, but I was charged £6.20 on the day.

As a little treat I had a look at their cake board, which today had a large cinnamon swirl, pink doughnut, dark chocolate flapjack and a few others in the selection.

I went for the Banana & Blueberry Layer Cake (£3.20).

The staff – which I assumed were a family – were very relaxed and cheerful, making me feel at ease.

It was nice thinking that I was supporting a local business instead of your faceless coffee corporations.

The hum of the town traffic buzzed whilst I sat and I couldn’t help thinking how many fumes I was inhaling in the centre of it all.

Every now and then you would get either an ambulance or police siren loop round you, a roar of a motorbike or nuisance driver.

It did make me want to stick on some headphones.

People passed by on their walks, stopping to have a look at the boat – many looking like they had just discovered it for the first time like myself.

My order came out very promptly, just under 20 minutes, and again I was greeted with a smile from the waiter.

I found the coffee was nothing special despite being named “fandango”, and for the price I would probably go for a normal iced in the future.

One thing it did do was make the drink thicker and colder – much more refreshing at the time when you feel like your face is melting off.

The salad was perfect for a hot summers day. Light, lovely and the perfect size – leaving enough room for the fresh slice of cake.

I was also was given a hefty wedge of brie as a substitute to my missing lemon houmous.

At the end of your meal, if you are desperate for a wee (like myself) you are provided with a code to use the staff toilet, instead of trekking back to the high street.

Don’t panic – it’s not on the boat, but instead inside a small hut opposite the cafe.

Overall, this hidden gem is a great alternative if you want to escape the hustle and bustle of the high street or avoid the coffee chains.

Visit while you can, as they are only open from March to October...just remember to bring your sunscreen!

Out of five:

Food: The salad was the perfect portion for a light summer lunch, despite not having houmous I was given a generous portion of cheese. ****

Drink: I don’t know if I was expecting more from the word “fandango”, but the iced coffee was refreshing but all in all disappointing. **

Decor: Outdoor wooden tables and chairs, along with some colourful patriotic bunting – it was a shame they didn’t have any parasols for shade-lovers like myself. ***

Staff: The two ladies who served me were struggling a little in the heat (I couldn’t blame them) but otherwise very cheerful and made me feel at ease. *****

Price: My Mediterranean lunch, along with a sweet treat and drink came to £18.70. I thought everything was pretty reasonable except for my glorified iced drink. ****