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See what reporters, Megan Carr and Laoise Gallagher found when opening their parcel of undelivered goods LIVE this afternoon.
So, with scissors and plenty of hand sanitiser at the ready we cracked open the parcel with both fear and excitement.
Last month, a box containing 250 individually tubed ants was discovered after being left unopened for eight months, it was opened by a firm in Folkestone which buys unclaimed boxes from delivery companies.
Our audience seemed to be just as intrigued as we were as to how the ants made it into the box and almost 220,000 readers made this article our most read of the entire month of August.
So, after a bit of a struggle online to find such a parcel, our mystery package finally arrived at the office this week with anticipation building among staff.
Everyone was dying to know what was inside - surely if we had purchased a box of live animals we would have heard something by now, right?
We knew the likelihood was slim, and with the brown cardboard branded ‘Eurotrail’, and a label on the side reading ‘Bike Rack’, we were not too hopeful for anything more than a lump of metal.
However, with a shake of the box not giving anything away, we were delighted to find that we couldn’t be more wrong.
The box was filled to the brim with 26 items, everything from toothpaste to printer ink - and to our absolute horror, a bright turquoise sex toy disguised as a ‘body massager’.
Much like an overexcited child on Christmas Day, we ripped the tape off the box and pulled everything out in a frenzy.
A couple of questionable items grabbed our attention from the outset.
The first of which being a white glossy tube of cream for men by the brand “Dr Ballz” - an intimate balm for men with no safety seal or box.
We approached the tube with caution, unsure where it may have been, and after some research into the department of men’s intimate moisturiser we discovered it retailed at up to £17.
This was just the beginning, as a damaged cardboard box branded ‘body massager’ reared its head from the bottom of the box.
It made no noise initially, but the seemingly innocent unopened parcel soon sent vibrations of controversy through our Medway riverside office.
We tentatively peeled back the sellotape, and inside was a wrapped rubber sex toy alongside a bag for safe-keeping and very graphic instruction manual.
The charger was also included, but the toy came ready to go and with a click of a button we were sent into hysterics.
Putting our childish sense of humour and HR department concerns to the side, this item does usually retail for around £30, so much of our money spent on the box had been made back with this product.
Although, with this being a customer returns box we were nervous that the item could have been tried and tested - so we swiftly returned it to it’s original packaging.
Continuing with the theme of feminine products, we then opened a Mooncup - a silicone menstrual cup.
Thankfully it was unopened and untouched with the cardboard and safety seal still intact.
These retail at £20.95, so by this point we realised that these mystery boxes may not be a complete scam, as our items had already totalled more than we paid for the box in total.
"It made no noise initially, but the seemingly innocent unopened parcel soon sent vibrations of controversy through our Medway riverside office..."
We were unsure this would be of any use to us, but these menstrual cups are in high demand at local food and hygiene banks, so decided that donating this to a local charity would be the best option.
There were some other strange items including some wrapping paper, shredded gifting tissue and even a detangling hairbrush.
All of these items were usable and despite some transit damage to external packaging, the items themselves appeared to be unused.
For the keen dental hygienists, this box would be extremely useful.
Inside we also found three tubes of toothpaste - one by the brand Colgate, and the other two were an unidentifiable Spanish brand.
There was also an unopened metal dental hygiene set, although how sterile the set would be is questionable so we decided to leave our dental care to experts and return the probing instruments to their bag.
It seemed that the majority of the more expensive items were technical products - however with it being a returns box we were not hopeful that they would be in working order.
Inside we found a cheap wireless computer mouse and a faulty gaming mouse.
A pack of printer ink and laser drum unit were also included - completely useless to a buyer without that specific printer.
We also unboxed some USB hubs, which work perfectly and will be used across the office along with a helix manual sharpener.
We definitely made some of our office colleagues happy, but it’s fair to say their hilarity firmly remained with the intimate men’s balm and sex toy.
A welcome giggle for all on a Thursday afternoon, despite the lack of individually tubed ants.
