More on KentOnline
More on KentOnline
A mum has vowed to set up a mental health charity after her son took his own life.
Tommy Thwaites, 25, was found hanged in his Maidstone flat on November 16 after battling mental torture for four years.
The former Valley Invicta pupil fell victim to a knife attack in 2015 which started his downward spiral.
He suffered with post traumatic stress disorder plus personality and emotional disorders.
Mum Claire Fry said mental health professionals did not do enough to help her best friend, son and "little side-kick".
She explained he did not have an hour a week counselling and had been to Albion Place, Maidstone a number of times where he saw many different consultants.
The mum-of-four said: “Nobody ever stayed in the same place, he never saw the same person more than three times.
“Tommy suffered with PTSD, personality disorder and an emotional disorder which means he couldn’t control his emotions.
“To us we would handle it but Tommy couldn’t handle it. He was also an anti-socialist which meant he was a recluse.
“Tommy couldn’t go outside without his medication because he would get worried that someone might attack him, which all comes from the stabbing.
“He changed from that day.
“They call them demons but I don’t call them demons I say he couldn’t cope anymore because he was severely traumatised.
“He looked out for help, he cried for help, and I tried to help him.”
In 2015 the then 21-year-old attempted to overdose and went to Priority House seeking help, where he collapsed.
His 46-year-old mum added: “He was in hospital and when he came out it was the self harming, it went 10-fold to the point where he was slashing his arteries and there would be blood everywhere.
"He continued to go back to Priority House banging on the windows saying 'help me', 'help me'.
“He was distressed, he needed help, he wanted it all to stop.”
Tommy had also been sectioned by police officers under the Mental Health Act and placed in Little Brook Hospital in Dartford, but his mum was not informed.
KMTV reports on tributes paid to Tommy Thwaites
Once she found out what had happened she called the hospital andbegged the hospital not to let him out.
She said: “I said to them please do not let him out he is in danger, he is going to hurt himself, but they let him out and we were told the crisis team would come and see us.
“They came and Tommy told them ‘I am going to hang myself’ and they just told him to call the number for the crisis team. I told them politely to leave my house.”
After that he saw a number of different professionals in the seven weeks leading up to his death.
By this point he was on at least five different medications including pregabalin, diazepam and duloxetine.
Diazepam is usually prescribed for a short time, around four weeks, but Tommy was taking them for four years.
Ms Fry added: “As a mother I didn’t want him to take all this but where he had been on them for such a long time I couldn’t take him off it.
“I begged the mental health teams, the last time I was there I was jumping up and down, telling them take him, he needs to go to a psychiatric unit.
“Tommy sat there saying 'I am going to hang myself', he was telling them directly. It was all very emotional.”
Miss Fry added: “I spoke to the mental health team just after Tommy died and I told them what he had done.
"I told them it is on your head, 'you killed my son'. They should have reviewed his meds.”
Now the trained criminologist is determined to set up a charity to help others like Tommy get the help they need.
She said: “Tommy is helping us to get justice, he didn’t get justice for the stabbing but he is going to get justice.
“The old Tommy was very happy-go-lucky and the Tommy that suffered with that illness was in a dark place.
"He was a colourful lad ever since he was a baby and he was my little sidekick. He was not on his own.
“He knew everybody and everyone loved him. He had such a beautiful soul. He was stunning.
“I am talking, I am keeping it together now but I have been in tears.
“I have got a support network around me that will help me when I am stronger set up the charity.
“I will have my own office where people can just walk in, sit down and have a chat for us to help them.
"I will get on the phone and ring everybody up they will definitely know who I am just you watch.”
Helen Greatorex, chief executive of Kent and Medway NHS and Social Care Partnership Trust, said: “We are truly saddened to hear of the tragic death of Mr Thwaites.
"Our sincerest condolences are with Mr Thwaites’ family and all those who loved him.
“In instances where someone who has died has been known to our services, we work closely with Her Majesty’s Coroner as well as the person’s family to ensure that all the questions that people have are answered.”
She said the trust would work with the coroner to ensure all questions the family have are answered.
Tommy’s funeral is at 2pm Tuesday, December 3 at Vinters Park Crematorium. Everyone attending is asked to wear bright colours.
