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Alan Bennett blasted Michael Parkinson as a planning meeting turned sour last week.
However, this wasn’t a show-business spat – the celebrity namesakes instead clashed over a proposal to develop five garages in Hollingbourne.
Work to turn the Eyhorne Street garages into a two-bed flat could seriously damage historic homes, according to residents and Hollingbourne Parish Council, as it would require construction vehicles to use a narrow lane bordered by listed buildings.
A seething Cllr Bennett, for the parish council, said the way residents had been kept in the dark, with many not being consulted, was against the law and suggested a conservation officer called Michael Parkinson be knighted for “long-distance sight”.
He said: “One of these houses dates back to 1462.
“It is not a relic or a curiosity or a folly.
“It is a lovely family house which the owner and his wife are rightly proud of.
“It is built without foundations and I’m almost prepared to say so are most of the comments made by the developer.”
He added that the planning process had lacked “a spirit of co-operation and friendship”, with residents “stonewalled by the developer and the planning department”.
“These are very reasonable people, they aren’t Nimbys or numpties. They’re proud of where they live and want to see things done properly.”
Mr Bennett continued: “The conservation officer said he was satisfied the development would not be harmful to the conservation area or listed buildings.
“He’s a very clever man because he’s never been there. ”
After a long debate, Maidstone Borough Council planning committee was split on how to proceed.
With his deciding vote, chairman Cllr John Perry refused the application based on his belief that work could not be physically carried out but was forced to back down after members objected, saying this was not a planning department concern.
The application, which can be viewed at bit.ly/holgarages, was eventually deferred to allow the developer to provide information on the impact of construction.