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Striker Tom Eaves was about to be substituted before he saw red.
Gillingham head coach Ady Pennock had seen enough, with a minute left of the first half.
Eaves had already been booked for a foul and, according to Pennock, he was getting involved in ‘too many scraps’.
He was shown a straight red by referee Eddie Ilderton after leaving Rochdale’s Bradden Inman on his backside.
“The sending off summed up the first half really,” said Pennock, whose team was already 2-0 down.
“It was a poor red card. I am not sure if he punched him or elbowed him but he shouldn’t have got involved in the first place.
“It is something we will have to look at. He shouldn’t have been anywhere near the lad and he had a yellow card before.
“We were going to take him off at half-time and there was only a minute to go. He was getting into silly scraps, which he shouldn’t have done.
“Tom has been very good for us but he’s let himself and his team-mates down.”
Despite the frustration at losing a man, the Gills boss wasn’t leaving Eaves to take all the blame.
Pennock said: “I don’t blame Tom for the defeat, not at all, (but) it doesn’t help at all.
“You are climbing a mountain when you go down to 10 men. Before that we were already 2-0 down. I blame the team, I wouldn’t blame any individual.”
The straight red card means Eaves will miss three Gills games, but he must first serve a one-game ban for accumulating five bookings. It means he will miss the club's next four ELF fixtures.
EFL suspensions don't count in the Checkatrade Trophy, so he could feature in next Tuesday's game against Colchester.