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Steve Lovell felt Rotherham looked hungrier than Gillingham on a disappointing night at Priestfield.
Gills' winless run stretched to seven games after a poor performance against a Millers side whose 1-0 victory ensured a League 1 play-off place.
The visitors took the points courtesy of Will Vaulks' first-half strike, with Gills quickly running out of ideas.
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Lovell, who later described it as his most disappointing night in charge, said: "We were too direct, there weren't enough options on the ball and I felt at times they were a lot quicker than us in certain situations.
"They're a good side, they're up the top and they remind me of the way we were six weeks ago to a month ago.
"They were hungry, they were quick to close down and tonight we weren't.
"It's very disappointing because we have put in some really good performances this year to get where we are in the league but tonight was a very disappointing performance.
"There was frustration through the supporters, which I can understand, it's frustrating for me as a manager and it's frustrating for the players.
"But there's three games to go and we've got to try and get back to some kind of normality on Saturday and give the crowd something to cheer."
Rotherham had more to play for but that was no excuse for Lovell.
He said: "I just said to the players in there, it's a little bit different when you're going for promotion or in the play-offs, perhaps there is that little extra 2-3% in everybody that they find to have that extra push, but that shouldn't happen.
"Our boys are professionals, they get paid to play football and entertain, so they should be."
Josh Parker had the ball in the net but his header was ruled out for offside.
That's been a theme this season and Lovell has had enough.
He said: "As a centre-forward, when the ball's coming in the box, you should never be offside. It happens too many times.
"I think it must have happened half a dozen times tonight from free-kicks out wide or crosses where we're in offside positions.
"Centre-forwards shouldn't be in that position, they should be onside, in a position to get a goal that counts.
"We've had four or five, maybe six goals disallowed this year through being offside from crosses and it shouldn't happen."