I’d got some time to kill and an avid Secret Drinker had suggested it would be worth me popping into the Hare & Hounds, just outside Ashford.

Recommendations are tricky things so I wasn’t sure what I might find – what I didn’t expect to discover was a small group of fellows, many carrying notebooks under their arms, indulging in funny handshakes and pulling on the goat’s beard.

Okay, I’m making the goat bit up, but without being too judgemental, I was forced to agree with the fellow alongside me, that the bar set for entry to the Freemasons is set much lower these days.

Once quorate, and armed with drinks, they quickly shuffled off to an upstairs room where they could conduct their behind closed doors business without fear of interruption.

I had to pass a solitary fagger on the pub steps outside to get in but he swiftly moved aside so I could gain entry and there was a similar shuffling around at the bar to allow me to order a pint.

The barman broke off his discussion about the quality, or more accurately the lack of quality, displayed by the current Man United goalie and when I asked what the best beer available was he suggested Fosters (Note to self: ‘Avoid his advice on drinks or footie’).

I fell into the trap and opted instead for a pint of Doom Bar, which proved to be flatter than the proverbial dead cat. Surely turning down an Amber Nectar can’t end up being a bad decision, or can it?

Next through the door was Albert who, presumably despite previous experiences, not to mention advice from me, also ordered a Doom Bar.

The pub, promoting itself proudly as an 18th century inn, has plenty of low beams, a decent-looking set of hand pumps and several interesting tables made from barrels decorated with, among other things, old copper coins.

But despite several nice touches, including a double-sided fireplace between the bar and dining room, my initial impressions weren’t the best.

For a start, there was an overwhelming smell of old, burnt fat emanating from the kitchen and most folks, including the barman, spent far too much time with their faces buried in their phones.

To be fair, I didn’t sample the menu - there was only one group in who’d ordered food and, with youngsters still wearing uniform, it looked like a family group getting their tea after school - but the smell would certainly have dissuaded me from selecting anything fried.

There was a big TV screen, but it wasn’t switched on and there were also speakers dotted about the place, but no music was being pumped through them. Though the barman had got his own small screen set up near the till so he could monitor progress of a fairly meaningless low-level European footie match.

However, it was when I took a quick wander outside and, more specifically, when I visited the gents, I felt the aforementioned reader might have made a good point. The side of the pub is very tatty with all sorts of junk chucked all over the place, which looks completely at odds under the entrance proudly displaying the pub’s 300-plus year history.

The frilly lace curtain in the gents looked similarly incongruous but it was the fact the urinal was completely backed up and blocked that left me feeling they’re not paying enough attention to the details.

I know there will also be a few who might get their knickers in a twist over the saucy postcards but I reckon they’re okay on the wall of a gents’ toilet.

The Hare and Hounds is a real locals’ pub, which is fine, and talking about football incessantly is also okay, but only having a bad Doom Bar on draught is not ideal.

There’s plenty of space here not being utilised and, with a fresh pair of eyes, it would be incredibly easy to give the place a good spruce up.

As I said at the start, recommendations can be tricky but having taken a good look I’d have to agree that this should be a brilliant local boozer, but it needs to up its game.

I know money is tight, but having a good clear up would cost nothing and removing that lace curtain would be a start, perhaps it could be used to mop up the urinal?

HARE & HOUNDS, MAIDSTONE ROAD, ASHFORD TN25 4NR

Decor: The pub has a fairly old-fashioned look about it, but that’s fine for a building boasting this sort of age and history. The basis is all here, but a decent spruce up would work wonders. ***

Drink: If the only draught ale available is Doom Bar, and a fairly dodgy one at that, it’s not good. Even the barman rated a pint of Fosters ahead of his ‘best’ beer. **

Price: If it had been a decent pint then the £4 I paid for Sharp’s staple offering wouldn’t be too bad. There were two meals on the blackboard – a nduja burger was £15.95 and a rack of ribs £21.95. I can’t comment on the food, but the pint wasn’t great. **

Staff: When he wasn’t talking about, watching or sympathising about football the barman was attentive and poured a reasonable looking pint – maybe I just made a bad selection! **

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