More on KentOnline
Home Secret Drinker Article
Walking down the road towards the Red Lion, The Apprentice reckoned a live band was playing.
But a couple more steps along St Peters High Street and the full karaoke horror kicked in as tunes, if not being killed, were definitely being tortured to within an inch of their lives.
A first glance along the packed bar had me thinking it might be a fancy dress, but then I spotted the pool table looking like something from the Generation Game, weighed down with bottles, cuddly toys and toiletries.
Fortunately, a poster cleared up the confusion and we realised it was a fundraising do following the very sad death of Louey Davey. Apparently, his mum works behind the bar here so his friends and family had got together to raise cash and help her out with the unexpected funeral costs.
They were certainly throwing themselves into the cause and everyone was surprisingly upbeat, with one notable exception. The regular on our table, a remarkably impressive Jimmy Hill look-a-like, was competing for the most miserable man in the pub award.
He immediately leant across and ‘whispered’ at about 100db ‘What the bloody hell do they look like, and they sound even worse’. Following this opener his language became ever-more colourful as he became even more disparaging – when he took some raffle tickets from his pocket we realised he was only hanging around for one thing.
All of a sudden the Apprentice became very agitated and asked if we might take a look at the beer garden out back. I grabbed my pint of St Austell Proper Job (sadly not aptly named as it wasn’t) and followed him and his Guinness. We found ourselves in a very pleasant, well cared for, area with plenty of floral decorations and some wonderfully fragrant, exotic smoke wafting on the breeze. Oh, and the biggest pub umbrella in the world.
Questioned about his hasty exit, he explained he wasn’t able to continue listening to pink-clad Martina murdering Skyfall as he’s due to see Adele in a few weeks and this might leave him too scarred for the gig.
Fortunately, the song choice (for which each participant had to put 10p in the bucket) had moved on and we returned indoors just in time to spend a tenner on two strips of raffle tickets and hear our drinking companion’s latest take on which classic tune was being butchered the most.
I know it was a special night but there’s a real community spirit to this pub and I think that would exist even if it was a normal Saturday night.
It’s a huge lump of a building and is surrounded on all sides by residential properties so I assume local folk are well used to having this lively place just across the road.
I’d spotted a small quiet room on one side of the pub which was also the farthest point from the vocalists – either this or the fact it looked like a front room meant it proved to be very popular.
Both the elegantly tiled floor and a character with googly eyes spying on the urinals make the gents well worth a mention – and, they were impeccably maintained.
Back in the bar, which was completely mobbed by 10pm, our new pal finally had a win on a pink ticket and chose a cuddly toy four times the size of his own dog.
As the raffle ended, our impromptu DJ kept the colourful lights on the ceiling and we moved into an auction. The Apprentice got a rush of blood and, using my cash, as he doesn’t carry any, bid on and secured, a dodgy lot which will remain secret – all I’ll say is there seemed to be a lot of Botox treatments on offer as well as several meal vouchers.
As I always say, the nature of my reviews means they are a snapshot in time and I have no way of knowing what an ordinary Saturday evening in the Red Lion might be like.
But fundraiser karaoke or a quiet pint or two with the regulars I still reckon this place is very special – needs must and when required this community pulled together in the best way possible to support one of their own.
And our ‘miserable’ mate finally showed what a decent chap he was when he took another cuddly toy for his neighbour and put two others he had won back in the raffle. Although his view on this form of entertainment hadn’t shifted one iota and as he left he said: “That was some experience, you get all the weird and wonderful folk in when they have karaoke.”
RED LION, HIGH STREET, ST PETERS, BROADSTAIRS CT10 2TQ
Décor: This is a well-kept, local community boozer on a large corner plot and everything about it makes you feel comfortable and welcome. It looks as if the owners care about it just as much as its customers. ****
Drink: I’ve had a decent pint of Proper Job previously but this wasn’t quite so good and felt a little flat. The Guinness, however, was an excellent example and the Moretti exactly what you would expect. ***
Price: The Proper Job IPA was £4.30 and a pint of Guinness was £5.20. A Moretti was a little more expensive at £5.60. Probably the best deal of the night was the 10p charge to get on the microphone – or maybe not! ***
Staff: It was clearly an extremely busy evening but both barmaids remained cool, collected, efficient and cheery – even flat out they still had time to share a word and a laugh. *****
Catch up on all Secret Drinker's Kent pub reviews here
Click here to follow Secret Drinker on X
Want more Secret Drinker? Sign up here for his monthly newsletter