A heartbroken daughter who has seen her mum just once in more than six months during the coronavirus crisis is calling on the government to change its care homes policy.

Jane Driscoll, from Sittingbourne, is backing a campaign to give care home residents safe visits from their loved-ones – to stop them from dying of a broken heart.

Up until last Wednesday, Jane had not seen her 85-year-old mum, Rita, who lives in a care home in Sittingbourne, for more than six months.

But while she was eventually allowed to visit last week, this is not the case for many up and down the country and she doesn't know when she will be able to see her mum again.

The mother-of-two is now calling for continued family contact with those in care homes to take place in a safe and controlled manner.

Jane said: "There's disparity between how care homes have responded to the government guidance. Some have started letting people in, others won't take the risk.

"It's not the care homes' fault, they are just following the guidance."

Jane said the disparity is there because the government guidance advises against face-to-face visits in care homes – instead encouraging the use of digital means of communication.

However, it also says that if care homes wanted to take the risk and allow visitors in, this "should be limited to a single constant visitor, per resident, wherever possible".

"My situation might have changed – and I am very grateful to have now seen my mum – but for many others across the country it hasn't," Jane said.

"I don't blame the care homes for being reluctant, and I thank them for looking after my mum so well, but our mums and dads are stuck in the middle of this and they don't deserve to be stuck there until the government changes the guidance or if they die beforehand.

"There needs to be a standardised approach. If some care homes can facilitate visits, maybe they all can with some creative thinking. We've seen examples of what solutions care homes have built, for example giant Perspex shields, even an enclosure."

"My mum is in a home 10 minutes down the road but the current government guidelines forbid me to see her."

The 55-year-old added: "You cannot deal with this by simply locking our loved ones away and not letting anyone see them.

"Not being able to see my mum at the beginning of lockdown, when the whole of society was locked down, was understandable – no-one could see their loved ones.

"But, I have been fighting since July to see her, after we were told we can go on a plane, go to a pub or a restaurant, have a massage, get our eyebrows done and so on.

"My mum is in a home 10 minutes down the road but the current government guidelines forbid me to see her."

Jane's mum has advanced dementia and, in February last year, she was given six to 12 months to live, unless she responded well in a care home.

"We're 18 months later now so she's already on borrowed time, we don't know how long she's got to live," she said.

"But the painful situation we're in, as a family, is that my mum has gone from having visitors virtually every day to nothing.

"You can't have digital contact with people with dementia. So many people like my mum can't understand or communicate with an iPad or similar device being waved in their face. Who knows what's going on in their mind.

"All they know is that they were seeing their family every day and now they're not."

For Jane's family, her father Norman is Rita's designated visitor. The couple have been married for almost 58 years.

But, unless changes are made to the government guidance, it means Rita won't be able to see all of her family until the pandemic is over.

"There is a real possibility that my mum will have died before we get out of this pandemic, we simply do not know when it will be over, and that's the reality for families like mine," Jane said. "This policy of shutting people in care homes away is cruel and has taken away the residents’ human rights to have a family life.

"There has been a 53% increase in dementia-related deaths since the pandemic began and experts in dementia believe there is a lonely heart syndrome. They are giving up the will to live as their mental health has been so severely impacted by not seeing their families."

Jane is now urging people to sign a petition calling for care home residents to have visitors. It already has more than 109,000 signatures and she hopes it will be debated in Parliament.

To sign, click here.

Read more: All the latest news from Sittingbourne