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A cheating prison officer acquitted of raping a teenager in Margate wrote a letter to his wife while awaiting trial, asking for forgiveness.
Married James Evans, 41, had denied attacking the 15-year-old in Birchington in July last year.
In a letter he penned to his partner Hayley he wrote: “Babe, firstly I am not a rapist. I have not had intercourse with anyone else.
“I love you with all my heart and I know this will hurt you so badly. I just prey [sic] you can forgive me.”
Evans addressed it: “For my darling wife, Hayley. This is for you, but can be shown to the police or anyone else you wish to show it to.
“I will love you always whether you love me or not.”
Later he added: “I don’t blame the girl for what happened at all and I made bad judgments.
“I could have stopped things a lot earlier. Looking back I wish I had but I can’t turn back time.”
The prosecution at Canterbury Crown Court had claimed he had met the girl, who was crying after a bust-up with a boyfriend, in Margate.
The teenager had alleged she was befriended by Evans who offered her a lift and the two went to a remote spot on Westgate beach.
Evans later told police the couple had consensual sexual relations short of full sex after she told him she was 16 years old.
He told the jury he had been in Margate after planning a fishing trip when he met the teenager, who then asked to go for a drive.
Evans, of Durban Crescent, Dover, told police officers: “We stopped by a beach, got out of the car and talked.
“She kissed me. I responded by kissing back.
“She suggested getting back in the car to go to somewhere quieter. She showed me where to go. We stopped then she said let’s get in the back.”
In the letter he wrote to his wife – which was read to the jury – Evans said: “I am not a rapist and I have not had full sex with her behind your back.”
In the letter he gave a graphic description of the sex act before adding: “What a mess my darling, for a few seconds suspended over her in shock and already, as you can imagine, waves of guilt came over me.
“This now quite chirpy happy-with-herself girl said ‘Can you drop me off now please?’”
He said that later he abandoned his fishing trip and drove around “aimlessly”, adding: “I felt so guilty having done that behind my loving wife’s back that I didn’t go fishing that night.
“Finally came to the decision to take the coward’s way out and put it all to the back of my head and act like it never happened.”
After two trials – the first ending without a verdict - the jury acquitted him of rape.